I know, I feel.

I know how you feel because I feel it too.

In a little more than a week I will be embarking on a plane headed to Chicago. That gives me a little more than a week to express what it is that I have in my heart, in my head, in my plans, and in my soul for you. If i am a writer - and hope to one day have a voice that others can hear - there is no better way to create one than to have the courage to give a voice to your heart.

In a little over a week when I come to Chicago I may not even see you. In a little over a week I may leave Chicago heartbroken in the same way as I was the last time I left Chicago, and as I was the time before that that I left Chicago. You may want nothing to do with me. I may fail at letting you in to what I see for us.

Bonita, I love you. I will spend the next week sharing with you what I think and feel about us and us as it pertains to the future. I will tell you what I know, what I don't, what I fear, what I want, what can be, and what may not.

I know you're scared. I know you don't want to let your heart out to me in fear that it will only be hurt more than it already has been. I know if you are to have me in your life it is to have me for the long run, and that most likely entails being together in Chicago. I know you're worried that I will ultimately be unhappy being there. I know these things because they are the same thoughts that I have.

What I do know is that I love you. And I know that you are my blue moon. Our lives together will be much different once I get my flight benefits. And ultimately, I would rather have you in my life in some way, no matter how much effort needs to be exerted, than to not have you at all. I feel my heart beat for you, as if I have never breathed before you.

All I can ask is that you read these words and hear these songs, and I can only hope that you will understand.

Follow your heart mi amore.

I love you Bonita.

Always

-Kyle